We all hate phone solicitations aka "courtesy calls." It never fails; those people call at the worst time ever! Today, for example, I was in a hurry to get the kids to their doc appointment, and because I had let them sleep a little longer than normal at nap time, I was running late (imagine that!). So here I am, in the middle of changing a shitty diaper (It's inevitable, when it is time to walk out the door, somebody always poops!), and my cell phone starts ringing at the same time as the house phone, meanwhile the dog is barking at her shadow I think (maybe she is working on her audition to be the next official groundhog- obviously the current title holders are blind and can't see their shadows anyway, giving everyone false hopes of a speedy spring and here we are snowed in!). So I answered the cell and it was someone wanting to give me an insurance quote that will only take one moment ma'am one moment please- um no thank you please take me off your call list, click. And my son answers the house phone! He thinks every call is for him and has yet to master the art of call screening via caller ID. He quickly hands me the phone when he realizes it is not for him. Here's the conversation:
caller: um yes Mrs. Nora Jones?
me: no I'm sorry this is the ____ residence. You must have the wrong number.
caller: Oh no, this is _______(#) right?
me: yes it is, but this is not the Jones' residence.
caller: Well then you must know her?
me: Nope, never met her, but I have been getting calls for her for the past year and a half that I have had this number. What do I need to do to have my number removed from your call list?
caller: Year and a half? Well, Mrs. Jones, this is blah blah blah collections and we are contracted by _____ company to collect the debt you owe them.
me: Once again, you are mistaken, I do not owe them, Mrs. Jones does not live here. I do not know Mrs. Jones. My name is not Mrs. Jones, and no Nora is not my porn name!
caller: um...uh...Have a good day ma'am.