I Think I'll Name Him Stan!

So for the past several weeks, my son has been begging incessantly for me to allow him to start wearing deodorant (He is 7!!). He has been coming to me with some pretty convincing arguments:
  • All my friends are wearing it.
  • I get really sweaty when I play outside.
  • I don't want to stink at school.
  • My teacher told the whole class we should wear deodorant.
  • Real men wear deodorant.
  • and the list goes on...
He even had went through the sale ads and contrived a mental list of the different brands he felt would be the best suited for him. lol Mom, what about Speed Stick, that way when I run fast, I will stay smelling good. Or Right Guard, that sounds like it works good! My uncles wear Degree, and they don't stink too bad, maybe I could get that one, or my personal fav...Dad wears Old Spice! Now that's what a man should smell like! lol.
So for weeks I have been denying him deodorant telling myself that he is too young for it, and won't need it until puberty begins, and didn't I read an article some time ago about the negative effects an antiperspirant can have on the glands if it is not needed or overused? Then he came home smelling putrid after playing basketball and various other outdoor quests for a few hours. It was one of the worst stenches I have ever witnessed! It also happened to be a Sunday and he immediately walked in and began perusing the ads, remarking again about all the different brands, and finally came to a new request...Mom, if I can't have deodorant can you just get me some Axe, so-and-so wears it!. Um, NO! That stuff stinks almost as bad as you do right now! Go take a shower! So I let a couple days go by and each day he came in from playing smelling a bit worse than the day before, still chatting and trying to convince me he needed deodorant...I agreed, It was time!
So before school one morning, I broke out a bottle from the stockpile...I showed him how to put it on correctly and sent him out the door with his daily philosophic quote...Now that is what a man should smell like! lol.
So after school he comes home really excited...
  • Mom, I played so hard at recess, and was so sweaty, and Guess What?!?!
  • What?!?! I said with anticipation....
  • I didn't stink! I just smelled like deodorant, and someone (definitely a girl) said I smelled good today!
Oh, God help me, it has begun I thought...but no it gets better... He went upstairs after finishing his homework to change to go out and play, running down the stairs like the house was on fire, I hear:
  • MOM!!!
  • Oh no I thought, "What happened?"
  • You HAVE to SEE THIS!!!
  • Now that I knew there was nothing to worry about, and my house was not in fact erupting with flames, I calmly asked what he needed to show me....

  • It's AN ARM PIT HAIR!!! It must have grew while I was at school! The deodorant helped it grow! I'm a man! I have armpit hair! and he strutted out the door!

LMAO! I laughed not having the heart to break it to him that it was probably just a stray lint or small string from his shirt. lol. So now he has been bragging to all of his friends telling them that he wears deodorant, has an armpit hair, and he's a man! I really expected him to name said hair like he saw in an episode of Zeke and Luther. That would have just made my day even funnier, but the arm pit hair shall remain nameless, for now!

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